Blocking messages from one person

Hi there,

It can be so challenging helping our kids deal with something like Social Networking, especially when they think parents just don't get it. Still, speaking as a mom of three and Symantec's Internet Safety Advocate, I like to suggest approaching this issue as a general parenting issue for kids on the internet.

I always recommend joining MySpace or whatever social networks your child is on. (OnlineFamily.Norton will show you that.) Then ask your child, as a condition of being allowed on social networks to "friend" you. You will need to assure them that you will still respect their privacy but you have a right to be in their online environments, just as you are in the real world. It can be tough if you are dealing with an older teen but it's worth it to do it anyway.

Next, I also recommend (and this is easier to establish as a ground rule when they are really young, like 5 and joining gaming sites like Webkinz) you have their password on file. This means, if God forbid, a tragedy occurred and your chlid were missing, you would have immediate access to their communication with others on the internet, which in some cases has allowed the police to get to missing children in time. It's an extreme example but it works.

Next, just as you should sit with your child when configuring OnlineFamily.Norton to explain your house rules, I suggest you and your chlid discuss what troubles you about the messages this "friend" is sending. If the other person is a real world friend, I recommend your child tell them you have a new policy which is a 3 strikes rule. Any message that is in bad taste, insulting or otherwise doesn't meet your standards will be deleted. If three messages are deleted, you will block the friend. This usually gets things under control pretty quickly.

here's a link to MySpace's privacy settings where you can learn how to block people:

http://www.myspace.com/Modules/ContentManagement/Pages/page.aspx?placement=privacy_settings

to sum this up: (1) friend them on MySpace; (2) get their MySpace password; and (3) create the 3 strikes rule.

If your child is resistant, remember, you can block MySpace entirely as a solution. I'm sure that will get them working with you to find a resolution. Good luck! I know this is very difficult stuff!

Marian Merritt