Another Internet Safety concept we need to put in context reflecting the "real world" is about talking to strangers online. It's still a best practice to teach our children not to talk to strangers, whether in the park or on the street or online. It's a sad truth that there are bad people out there. Bad people who might want to harm your child, or abuse their trust and naivete, or damage their reputation or credit. And there are enough "stranger danger" headlines on a daily basis to underscore that sad truth and help you teach your child about staying safe.
This concern has led most of the internet safety experts to focus on keeping your activities limited to people you know in the real world at all times. Certainly, I've shared this message over and over again. And I think it's still a good message. But let's check the advice against reality. The reality is, not only are our children talking to strangers online, they are learning this behavior from us!
The research confirms this. Symantec's ground breaking Norton Online Living Report surveyed adults and kids in 8 countries around the globe. We learned that almost half of those online are making new friends there and of those, 60-80% are converting those new friends to real world friends. Let me share a personal example of this trend: during my last pregnancy I joined a Yahoo group for women expecting around the same time. We shared all our news about our pregnancies, our hometowns, our jobs and other concerns. Over time, slowly at first, we developed a solid friendship that has lasted almost 7 years. And because I travel so much, I've been lucky enough to have met three of the women in "the real world."
Think about online dating. You are actively talking to strangers online, in the hopes that someone will prove worthy of knowing you in the real world. Or how about shopping via Ebay? Even if your contact is limited to a few back and forth emails to confirm you are buying the correct hubcap for your 1965 Mustang, you are still talking to strangers. So if we simply tell our kids to avoid online strangers while we talk with our own online friends, we miss an important educational opportunity.
Keep telling the youngest children to avoid online strangers. Teach your children to guard their private information and their passwords, even from their friends. But as your children get older and their activities increase in complexity, make sure your message matures as well. Teach your children when and how to talk to strangers online. Make sure they can identify appropriate forms of contact, maintain their privacy and know they can never meet an online friend in the real world without your knowledge and participation.